One of my favorite shows is “The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air” starring Will Smith. It had great humor and always made me laugh, but also confronted serious issues such as racism and absent fathers, and it didn’t shy away from hard plots. In one episode, Will’s uncle Phil has a heart attack and has to go to the hospital. The whole family goes down to see him, except Phil’s only son Carlton. When Will confronts Carlton about it, he discovers that Carlton can’t stand the idea of seeing his dad, his hero, in a hospital bed. And when Carlton finally does go to see his dad, he tells his dad that he's Superman to him because he could never imagine his dad having health problems, let alone a heart attack. It’s a real touching moment, but also one that I think a lot of people can resonate with.
Many of you have met my dad, although it was a few years ago when I first started here. He’s a goofy, comical, loving person, and he always has been. If you met his brothers, you’d see why. That’s the kind of family he came from, and I wouldn’t have it any other way. We have many pictures from my childhood of my dad doing things with us. He worked a lot, but he always had time for his family and for me and my brother. He made sure we were up for church each Sunday morning, but he never forced my brother or I to adhere to Christianity, which I think is one of the main reasons my brother and I are as strong and devoted Christians as we are. He allowed us to make our own decisions, but was always there if we needed help or advice. There was never a moment growing up that I ever questioned whether my dad loved me or not, even if he didn’t say it that much. He showed it every day.
And one of the best things about becoming an adult, I have gotten to transition from merely my dad’s son, who he needs to correct and teach a lot, to my dad’s friend. I hope you have had that experience with your own parents or kids, because it’s so special to me. We talk regularly nowadays, keeping up with what each other’s doing and what is happening in our lives. Yeah, it’s hard only seeing him a few times a year, but those phone calls sure do help.
Now, most of you, over the last few years have consistently asked me how my mom is doing, and for good reasons, and I don’t want that to stop. I am grateful that we are getting some positive news on her health. But through it all, my dad showed me just how much he loves my mom. He went out of his way time and time again to do what he thought was best to get her better. He has sacrificed so much in the last few years to get mom better.
He stopped working to be at home in case she needed help with something. He has had to figure out the finances of it all as a result, and God has been faithful to provide for them through all that they’ve dealt with. He’s had to single-handedly run the house for the better part of 3 years because of her health issues, and that’s taken a toll on him in many ways, but he still does it. He still helps. That’s who my dad has always been.
Fathers have a unique responsibility in the family, just as mothers do. Fathers are called to be leaders of the family. They are the head of the household. We have a lot of people in this world that didn’t have that leadership growing up, and they suffered because of it. We need more men to step up as fathers to help their kids grow up. Fathers aren’t only crucial to their kids’ development, but also to their spiritual devotion.
According to data collected by Promise Keepers and Baptist Press, if a father does not go to church, even if his wife does, only 1 child in 50 will become a regular worshiper. If a father does go regularly, regardless of what the mother does, between two-thirds and three-quarters of their children will attend church as adults. If a father attends church irregularly, between half and two-thirds of their kids will attend church with some regularity as adults.
If a mother does not go to church, but a father does, a minimum of two-thirds of their children will end up attending church. In contrast, if a father does not go to church, but the mother does, on average two-thirds of their children will not attend church.
Just as my father was influential in my journey to become a Christian, every father has the same responsibility in their families. It’s not a responsibility to take lightly, either. The idea that a father has such an impact, ultimately, on their children’s eternal dwelling place should drive all men to do what they can to help their kids know Jesus, because there is nothing greater for a man to do than to lead his children to God.
So, fathers, I implore you to put God first in your life, not only for your sake, but for your kids’ sake, because they are watching you, whether you realize it or not. Then one day, you will both be able to hear the words, “Well done, good and faithful servant.” And I would be hard pressed to find better words to hear in this lifetime or the next.
"Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord." -Ephesians 6:4
